How to write a book quickly

It’s all about consistency

I’ve read a dozen books on how to write books, which feels like reading blog posts about how to make money blogging. Each one has a different approach, just like every single author goes about the task of writing differently. I’ve been writing seriously for about three years, and I’ve written two books, one self-published on Amazon called “Through the Amazon” and one which I’m using to seek representation. I wrote them both differently, but here’s what I’ve learned:

The morning is your friend

Every morning I write, not because its when I work the best, not because I want too, but because it’s the only time in the day where there is nothing else in my head. My brain is the opposite of a sponge, which is to say that the more I soak up the less I can wring out. As soon as I open my phone, or click on my YouTube bookmark, or crack a book my creativity goes down like mad. So when I wake up I go straight to the computer; I don’t brush my teeth, I don’t eat breakfast, I don’t even pee — I just write, and I write until whatever I want done is finished.

Write in sprints not jogs

When you have an idea in your head and you know your way around a keyboard two thousand words can come out on the page very quickly. It’s the pauses that hold up the writing process. The reality is if you know exactly what you are going to say a rough draft of a solid novel is an endeavor of fifty hours; of course, writers know that coming up with the story is half the problem, the other half is delete, cut, and copy.

Have two projects at a time

I always start off my day writing, but writing is only half of writing (if that makes sense). The other half is editing, re-reading, re-writing, and re-reading. This process involves everything from digging a diamond out a solid wall of rock to polishing it, and then of course selling it for the big bucks. Herein lies the beauty of two simultaneous projects, a method that has allowed Steven King to write over fifty novels in fifty years ( check out his book “On Writing” it is the greatest source for writers on the market). I start by working on a rough draft of whatever book I have in my head for an hour or so until I have anywhere from a thousand to three thousand words, and then I switch to another project which needs editing. If you have an idea for just one book and haven’t started just work on that in the beginning, and when you are ready to start editing have another idea in your head ready to start.

Blogging

Blogging is a little different, it is very easy to write a post, edit it, and publish it all in one breathe, and this is what I do. Writing blog posts for me are taking a snapshot of my mind, and if I were to go back and edit them later something of the feeling of that moment would be lost. For books this is inescapable. I find myself writing in a completely new style on a project I’ve been working on for months, which inevitably means I will have to go back and edit it to match the rest of the book. While this is annoying I try not to constrain myself while I work, if my style wants to be different for the day I will not tell it to do otherwise.

Time for reflection

An author’s most valuable tool is solitude, and I mean from all things. Every person who is trying to bring a story up from thin air just by using their brains must recognize that they will need time to think. I like to think while I pace, but I’ve also had some great concepts come to me while I was laying in bed. Do not feel lazy, do not feel like it a waste of time to simply sit down with no phone or book and think.

Extra advice

If you can’t type quickly find a free app online and practice; if your thoughts move faster than your fingers simply make your fingers faster. Read as much as you write, if you don’t have time to read every day take-up audiobooks, it the best way to see what is possible. And lastly, the key to writing, the KEY, is to stay consistent; if you write a thousand words a day every day for a year you could have three books to edit at the end; if you instead write three thousand words once a week you will have one. But it more complicated than the numbers, writing every day means you have a schedule, it means you can do it tomorrow and the next day without fail, and most importantly it means your mind is focused on the project; when you skip one day then there is no guarantee you will write the next day or the day after that.

If you want to know more about good books to read concerning writing or have any other questions you can contact me at livelibrarytv@gmail.com. I love most of you.

I read 1000 books and learned This

Hey you, that is you right?

A person? So You breathe right? And You read obviously. You feel and You think. And You are here, we might be a thousand miles away but we’re both here. That is what a book is, that’s what the internet is too. Because whoever You are, wherever You are, whatever time it is, we are here in the same place.

I’ve read 1000 books in the last 20 years, and they’ve taught me one thing: When you write something down and someone else sees it, you are connected. They taught me a few other things too: how to love, how to fight, what people think and how they live; but together they teach something different. When You sit down in front of a blank paper, when You pick up the pen or put Your hands on the keyboard You are changing the world.

“Never approach a blank page lightly.” Steven King

So what do we do? We world changers, we writers — well we bang our heads against brick walls, we delete and we paste, we exult and hide; more or less we write. And we write because there is a chance that someone one day might read our words and there’s a magic in that feeling. But we have changed the world, or else the world has changed us; people are making money with their words and we want a piece. We’ll fight for a piece if we have to, create clickbait and beg for attention — in short, we are trading in magic for money. It’s okay though. Sometimes money comes with magic and its okay. But for the sake of the blank page that stares us down in the mornings like a white sea of doom, let us not cover it in black ink for the sake of money. Read because you enjoy, write because you love, feel because you can; You are You, and we are together once again.

“It’s a dangerous business, going out your door. You step into the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there’s no knowing where you might get swept off to.” Our Beloved Bilbo

How to make your kids enjoy reading

A simple but effective method

Your kids don’t want to read, you got them an iPhone and now all they want to do is watch YouTube, or Twitch, or Tiktok, or bla bla bla. Their attention spans are shorter by the day, and you can’t even talk to them without inserting an Ad every five minutes.

You want them to read, that’s what you did growing up, it would probably make them smart, better at school; but you don’t want to make them — why? Because it’s too hard. Try locking a kid in a room for five hours and telling them they have to read this book you shove in their hands — good luck. Not only will they hate you but they will hate reading. It’s the book report conundrum — people just hate being told what to like, even little people.

So, you can’t force your kids to read, and they won’t do it on their own, what to do, what to do. We mind control the little devils. We tell them that they can’t read because books are too gory, or have to much action, or there just too cool for these kids to understand; then we let them see us reading.

We have to start treating books like alcohol, hide your books on the high shelves, put on audiobooks and then turn them off when they get close, and then wait — let the seeds plan. And then finally when your kids come begging you for a book you hit them with the audiobooks — cause here’s the truth, no matter how much a kid want to read if they’re used to YouTube they’re going to have a rough time getting through a paperback. Start them off with the audiobooks and get them hooked.

Now picking the right books is important. We can’t drop War and Peace on them but at the same time, they don’t want to read Charlottes Web — don’t forget that you tricked them into reading by making them think it was an adult thing. So let’s talk about audiobooks, there are a few out there that are so funny, narrated so well, or are just so interesting that they are impossible not to love. Start with these:

The Artemis Fowl series by Eoin Colfer narrated by Nathan Parker
The Bartimeus Trilogy by Jonathon Stroud narrated by Simon Jones
The Redwall Series by Brian Jacques narrated by Brian Jacques
So You Want to be a Wizard by Diana Duane narrated by Christina Moore
His Dark Materials by Phillip Pulman narrated by Phillip Pulman
And of course, Harry Potter by J.K. Rowling narrated by Jim Dale

Now, there are many more books geared towards kids, thousands of them, but these are the best to start off with. There may be books that you liked as a kid, books you think your kids will love — suck it up and start with these. They aren’t on the list because they’re good books (they are but), they’re here because they have the best narrators, plan and simple; when it comes to audiobooks these are the BEST ones. Any of them will do to start, gun to my head I’d say go with Artemis Fowl for the very first — its quick, smart, and funny. ANY of them will do. Then let the kids go wild.

What if You fall in love with a Robot?

I had a dream — no I actually dreamed this.

I was selling diamonds to a Sultan and fell in love with his daughter, she looked like a human; she ate, slept, and breathed like a human; but she wasn’t.. It was the year 2050, and the New World government is controlled by a super AI; we all have Elon Musk implants and our super AI overlords know exactly where we are and what we do. Human DNA is being used to create robots that are so life-like they are indistinguishable from the real thing — except they don’t age, they can’t reproduce, and they were not born. The global population is down, vaccines are created with algorithms, and everyone travels by magnetic trains; planes do not exist, gas power cars do not exist, and there are solar panels in space that run our major cities.

And MOST of us are still alive — most of us have found a way to survive for another thirty years on our little rock or our smaller little rock and we’re living in 2050, a year in which the world will change completely. And we’re slowly but surely falling in love with robots — why? No reason; they don’t do whatever we say, if we hit one we go to prison, if we kill one we go to jail — they are people, but they aren’t. We forget that they are not real because they are real; just like we know that person on YouTube that talks to us every day is not our friend, we know these are robots, but that’s not what it feels like.

And what if these robots have free will? Not true free will but at least the kind we have, the one where we know we can kinda do whatever we want to but somethings are hard to do and we have jobs so maybe we can’t do other things, and we’re tired today so maybe we’ll use our free will tomorrow. But that’s love isn’t it? Two people freely choosing to be with each other. So if a robot who can make their own decisions chooses to love me, and I happen to love them back, what does that mean?

In the dream her name was Nadia, and we got into a fight because I was on a dairy-free diet and she brought home cream cheese — is this the future? Yeah probably. One day you will die, maybe it will be in ten years, maybe it fifty; maybe your consciousness will be downloaded onto a computer and you’ll live for a thousand years; but one day, for sure, without any doubt, it will end; the computers will turn off, the memory card will fail, and what will remain? For me it was a very beautiful robot, standing by my bed, and self-destructing right after I died, that is love. And such is life.

Don’t read this if you really like Harry Potter (seriously don’t)

Cue normal world vibes: A man with a mustache doesn’t like people, he does like buns, he doesn’t like people who dress funny, he likes no post on Sundays. Cue old man with a long beard; is he Merlin? Is he Gandalf? Michael Gambon? Nope, its Brian, I mean Dumbledore: He’s old, he likes socks, scars in the shape of maps, and candy; he does not like being called Brian. He whips out a Deluminator and sucks up all the light in the street so no one sees him break child abandonment laws. Suddenly the cat on the wall that was pissing off mister mustache guy earlier turns into a women, a sexy little grey fox called Minerva McGonagall, she’s here because cats fucking hate secrets. Then a giant dude shows up on a flying motorbike and drops right in to this little party like they aren’t trying to be sneaky. He’s got a baby on the bike with no helmet on, which is fine with Dumbledore because he doesn’t give a single flying shit about child safety, and because he’s so meta that he knows the protagonist won’t die in the first chapter of the book anyway. This dope little gang drops the baby on mister mustache guy’s doorstep and proceeds to fuck off for 10 years.

Cue time jump: Harry Potter has a big oval egg head, no one likes him because he has a big oval egg head, his aunt keeps trying to cut his hair and it keep growing back because Harry wants to hide his big oval egg head. Mustache guy hates harry because his big oval egg head won’t fit in normal clothes. Harry has a cousin who’s fat, fatty cousin can’t do math, he likes to sit on toy guns, and hates when Harry gets letters. Cue Harry getting a letter–shit its probably the Library asking for a book back; hold up wait, mustache guy doesn’t like mail either, decides to board up the mail slot because he’s tired of getting trolled. Finally, he’s like screw this, screw all this spam, I’m going to drive to a car park, no a bridge, no a field, no a hut on a rock in the sea. He buys a gun to shoot the mail. Giant dude shows up, break mister mustache guy’s gun, losses his deposit on the hut, gives fatty cousin a pig’s tail, tells oval head to trust him because he’s a stranger–classic mistake. Brings big oval egg head to London, chases some clout in a local bar–people really like oval egg head, turns out he’s famous as shit, stutter mcturban face has a conniption when he sees big oval egg head because that’s just how he is–sike its cause stutter face is actually a bad guy (more on that later). Giant dude and oval head go to a bank and giant dude drops the literary equivalent the biggest fuck you’ve ever heard–Cue scene: Oval egg head: “I never know what’s the difference between a stalagmite and a stalactite.” Giant dude: “Stalagmite’s got an M in it (you fucking oval egg head lil bitch).” Mic drop of the century, oval egg head needs some burn cream, he needs some fucking water, he should just go back home at this point.

Oval egg head gets a wand from some old creep and goes back home to mister mustache guy for another month, fatty cousin still has a tail. Harry goes to the train station and acts like an ass for awhile until another foxy lady Molly Weasley helps him out. One of her sons is the same age as oval egg head and they bond because they’re both poor–sike oval head is rich now so he buys all the food on the train so no one else can get any. Foxy Molly’s son is a ginger but oval egg head doesn’t care because ginger face has a pet rat. Slithery snake Malfoy comes in pissed because oval head has all the food, oval egg head is like fuck you you’re blonde, blonde nose Malfoy is like see you later bitch. A girl comes in at some point and she has smart pants, she comes in and tells ginger face that he’s dirty and leaves. They get to Hogwarts, a hat tells ginger face his family is too big, puts smarty pants Hermione in the brave house because he feels like, and pretty much lets oval egg head pick which house he wants to go too. Classes start and oval egg head and ginger face are late to everything; giant dude has a dragon egg, smarty pants hates ginger face and oval egg head because they’re too cool for school but then she changes her mind.One of the teachers has greasy hair. Oval egg head isn’t paying attention when greasy hair talks so greasy hair blows up his spot. Oval egg head thinks greasy hair is a bad guy because oval egg head doesn’t know shit. Michael Gambon look alike Richard Harris is like “Do NOT go to the dark forest or the second level corridor on the right hand side. You will DIE, seriously DON’T go there.” Oval egg head, ginger face, smarty pants, and dumb dumb Neville decide to go both places and pretty much almost get fucked up both times. Our Michael Gambon/Merlin/Gandalf look alike gives oval egg head a invisibility cloak so he can break rules easier.

Oval egg head turns out to be really good at riding brooms, while he’s riding a broom blonde boy Malfoy drops some fire on ginger face and dumb dumb Neville–Set Scene: Blonde boy “If brains were money you’d (dumb dumb) be poorer then ginger face.” Ginger face/dumb dumb–no respond *Oval egg head broom dives: “Look ginger face oval egg head must have seen some money on the floor.” This is really as good as it gets when it comes to comedy of any kind on any medium.

Oval egg head, smarty pants, and ginger face want to stop greasy hair from stealing a rock, but dumb dumb Neville is in the way–Boom smarty pants attacks him; now there’s a three-headed dog in the way–Boom they put it to sleep; then some creepy plants–Boom smarty pants makes a fire with her wand because they don’t have wood; a flying key–Boom oval egg head break its wings; a chess set–Boom ginger face falls down; a troll–Boom they do nothing; some potions–Boom smarty pants is too smart and oval egg head goes in to face greasy hair alone..

But oh shit, its not greasy hair at all! Plot twist, it’s actually stutter McTurban head, he was the bad guy all along, and he’s got endgame boss Voldemort’s head living in his turban. Stutter McTurban attacks oval egg head but oval head kills him with the power of love. Endgame boss Voldemort is like Goddamnit and gets the hell out of there. Oval egg head passes out and wakes up with Michael Gambon, I mean Michael Richard leaning over him; old guy eats some ear wax and feeds oval head some class A bullshit. Oval egg head goes to the final feast and Old Guy is like you guys finished in last place, but guess what, oval egg head is my new favorite so I’m just going to give it to you guys cause fuck it, I’m fucking Gandalf.. I mean Old Guy *crowd goes crazy.